LETS HAVE A LITTLE LAUGH...

Drivers Licence

A Mom is driving a little girl to her friends house for a play date.

"Mommy," the little girl asks,

"how old are you?"

"Honey, you are not supposed to ask a lady her age," the mother warns. It is not polite"OK," the little girl says, "How much do you weigh?"

"Now really," the mother says, "these are personal questions and are really none of your business."

Undaunted, the little girl asks, "Why did you and daddy get a divorce?"

"Those are enough questions, honestly!" The exasperated mother walks away as the two friends begin to play.

"My Mom wouldn't tell me anything," the little girl says to her friend.

Well," said the friend, "all you need to do is look at her drivers license. It's like a report card; it has everything on it."

Later that night the little girl says to her mother, "I know how old you are, you are 32."

The mother is surprised and asks, "How did you find that out?"

"I also know that you weigh 140 pounds."

The mother is past surprise and shock now. "How in heavens name did you find that out?" And," the little girl says triumphantly,

"I know why you and daddy got a divorce."

"Oh really?" the mother asks. "Why?"

"Because you got an F in sex."

Hehehe... Did you like this one... I liked it a lot.. :)

3 Thins Men Can't Resist in a Woman

A Woman Who Smiles (More powerful than you might realize)

A woman who smiles makes it easier for a man to approach her by conveying an attitude of confidence and playfulness. Since many women are fearful of giving men the wrong impression they frequently guard their smiles.
While that approach is safer, it inadvertently sends the wrong message that she is someone who is overly cautious because they have been hurt.
In addition, smiling is a sign of acceptance. Men often need some signal that it is safe to approach a woman before they’re willing to a risk introducing themselves (unless they are intoxicated).

A Woman who Listens (and doesn’t dominate the conversation)

Men rarely get listened to, at least not beyond a few minutes. Most of the time a few minutes is all men really need. But since most men hate to be rejected, it is easier for them to keep conversations superficial. They expect most women to want to talk, rather than be willing to listen. If they happen to meet a woman who listens with her eyes (looks at him while he’s talking) as well as her ears, they are intrigued. Then, if she continues to listen and not take over the conversation, that’s the kind of woman that men can’t resist and will eventually marry

A Woman who dresses Feminine (Men are REALLY visual)

Everyone knows that men are visual. However, women often forget just how helpless guys are to what they see. The right visual stimulation can hypnotize a man. Women hear this and often become fearful. They mistakenly believe that men only notice perfect women.
Forget perfect! If you really want to be noticed by men, think colors, dresses and curves. Men basically like any woman who has that soft and cuddly quality. It isn’t that men don’t find women attractive in pants or when they are dressed comfortably. They don’t notice them as easily. It doesn’t catch their eye like earrings or long hair does.
Conversely, a powerfully dressed woman (think lots of red) makes most men think of sex, or not notice her at all. She may have a soft side, but if men can’t see it, they often don’t know it exists. The more feminine (softer) a woman dresses, the more men she will attract.

DANCING IN THE MOONLIGHT WITH U....

My heart beats for just you, my love.

Hear it calling to you in the night to fill your heart with pure delight,

a sweet song of joy sent from above.
Let me take you in my arms tonight,

hold you close and dance so slow we move together in the candlelight,

I whisper words of love to let you know.
You mean more than the world to me.

This is what we've been waiting for,

a time of healing love and joy so sweet,

a place where we can be as complete.
Let me hold you into my arms tonight,

press you close and dance so slow we move together

in the pale moonlight

I belong with you, my love,

I will never let you go.

THINKING OF YOU....

Your lips gently press against mine

A silent submission of tongues intertwined

My mouth tenderly presses against yours

My voice trembles as you start to explore...
Electric shocks as your tongue touches mine

An erotic dance of passing time

My heart's racing as fast as yours

My body's craving for something more!
Starving and Craving For an evening Of erotic bliss

Where dreams come true

With the sweetest Kiss.

13 SIGNS OF FALLING IN LOVE....

13. When your on the phone with them late at night and they hang up...but you miss them already when it was just two minutes ago

12. You read their texts over and over again..

11. You walk really slow when you're with them...

10. You feel shy whenever you're with them...

9. When you think about them, your heart beats faster and faster...

8. You smile when you hear their voice...

7. When you look at them, you can't see the other people around you... all you see is him/her...

6. You start listening to slow songs, while thinking of them...

5. They become ALL you think about...

4. You get high just from their scent...

3. You realize that you're always smiling to yourself when you think about them...

2. You would do anything for them...

1. While reading this, there was one person on your mind the whole time.....

2 Biggest 'LOVE MAKING Mistakes Couples Make

Mistake 1:

Feeling scared or embarrassed to ask about trying new things
Believe it or not, in 90% of the cases your partner would LOVE to try something new too but they're just as uncomfortable about bringing it up as you are.
Lovemaking, no matter how fantastic the basic act is, does get dull over the years. There is no shame in that. And you don't need to introduce whips, chains or a third person. That's nonsense! There are hundreds of ways to bring variety to your passionate play that aren't crude or dangerous. Which leads me to the next mistake…

Mistake 2:

Thinking that porn or toys will make your lovemaking better.
When sex hits a rough patch many couples (men especially) think that a video, some plastic or vibrating thingy will instantly take things through the roof. Wrong!
While toys can certainly have their place in your lovemaking repertoire, relying on them can be extremely dangerous. These outside sources of pleasure can quickly make lovemaking even less fulfilling.
Why? Because you don't want your partner to end up looking forward to their plastic toy more than you, do you? Couples need to first fully discover how to please all their spouses' body parts before introducing other elements. Think of them as a spice rather than the main course.

10 Love Making Tips to Light Ur Women's Fire

Use these 10 love making tips on your woman and you'll have her swooning with desire.

1. Touch

Women are very tactile beings. They love to be touched and caressed. Hold her, massage her, tease and tantalize her playfully with your fingers. Don’t go straight to the genitals, pay attention to her whole body.

2. Kisses

Deep passionate kisses are one of the biggest turn ons for a woman. Looking into her eyes or touching her face while kissing her can increase the arousal of the kiss. Kissing other parts of the body such as the neck, belly, inner thighs, buttocks, pelvis area surrounding the vagina, fingers and maybe even the feet for some can heighten her pleasure.

3. Emotional Connection

For women, sex is usually an emotional act as well as a physical act. The deeper the emotional connection, the better the sex will be for her and the deeper her desire for her lover will become. Share your feelings with your woman and express how you feel about her freely. For her, what goes on outside the bedroom is an important factor of what will occur in the bedroom.

4. Foreplay & Aferplay

*Pay extra attention to this very importan love making tip*There is nothing that is a bigger turn off for a woman than a lover who immediately begins penetration without tending to her body and mind. Just as important as foreplay is the period of time immediately following the sex, afterplay. Afterplay reinforces how a woman feels about the sexual experience and will have a great impact on how she responds to her lover in the future.

5. Make Her Feel Important,

Women also need to feel important to their lover. Take an active interest in who she is as a person and what goes on in her life. Ignite your woman’s passion by making her feel special, cherished and adored.

6. Value and Respect

For sex to be at its best, most women need to feel valued and respected by their lover. Her desire and level of satisfaction will grow deeper. She will want her lover more frequently and be more motivated to meet his sexual needs as well.

7. Listen

Women are more attracted to a man who listens to her and actually hears her. Being heard makes her feel important and valued, thereby increasing her feelings of intimacy with her lover and encouraging her to be free and uninhibited in her lovemaking. Her level of satisfaction is enhanced and her desire for her lover increased.

8. Show Her Your Passion & Desire

A woman wants to be wanted passionately. She wants to see your deep desire for her and feel how much you want her. Pursue her passionately and she will be a wild cat full of desire.

9. Take Your Time

*Another very important love making tip*The path to orgasm is just as fulfilling as the orgasm itself and the path is also important for enhancing her orgasmic experience. Take the long meandering road, savoring, pampering and adoring every part of her body along the way.

10. Be a Master of Oral

The majority of women cannot achieve orgasm through intercourse. Taking pleasure in delighting your woman orally is by far one of the most enjoyable ways for her to be satisfied.